In the words of Ziggy Marley...

I'm on a beach in Hawaii and I feel I have committed writers sin:

I forgot to pack my journal.

I've got sketchbooks, novels, tibetan literature... and no lined pages to fill.

So I figured I will use my blog as a journal for the time being.

I'm on the island of Maui for the first time in my life.
In a small beach town called Paia.
I swear this town is run by 20 something year olds.
My parents love it.

I'm with my immediate family in a little beach house on the ocean.
I'm sitting outside on a big patio that has a 60 inch tv on the wall.
Tropical plants are crowding us in, birds are flying around me.
And this morning a tiny lizard crawled out the sink drain.

My skin is flushed and my pores are clear.
My hair gets this wave to it in tropical regions.
As a very white redhead, sometimes I think I am meant to live in a tropical place.
It feels better to my body.

I'm struggling with some concepts I learned in my Women's studies classes.
Some feminists believe that those of us who travel to hawaii
are hypothetically "raping" the hula girl.
The white man corrupted the land to only live off of tourism.
So they depend on us completely for their well being.

The white man visits with his family,
pays insane rates for hotels and visits traditional luaus.
And while he may think that he is helping the islands with his dollar,
he is further destructing the ancient cultures of the land.

I have a lot of friends from Hawaii.
I've had a lot of conversations on this topic with locals.
While I get the idea of the hula girl being deculturized,
I simply don't think I agree with the entire philosophy.
(and have yet to find a native who agrees as well).
But I've only been here three days: I'm in no position to give my own educated thought.

I'm enjoying the peacefulness of this space.
I had terrible nightmares all night and woke up sweating and nervous.
I stepped outside and could hear the waves, singing birds, warm air.
Anxiety fades away very quickly in this climate.

I think its time for a morning jacuzzi,
singing off.

Jane.